Why Don't You Be You And I'll Be Me
by ScaliaFics94
Summary: Murven/Bellarke: Season 5 finale theories - Everyone is shipped off to a binary system planet, they awake years later out of cryosleep. Murphy has to deal with what he almost revealed to Raven before they went to sleep. Clarke and Bellamy have a choice to make about the status of their relationship.


The song for this fic is James Bay - Let It Go

MURPHY'S POV:

Everything was on a loop. How we were shuffled onto the Eligius ship and shoved into cryosleep pods. How we were scared of the unknown. How they told us we'd wake up before we knew what was happening. How Raven looked my way right before going under. How everything was just darkness. Everything was on a loop.

Until it wasn't.

The air became thicker. My eyes flashed open. The lids of the pods ascended. I hoisted myself up. My head turned.

Raven and I locked eyes almost immediately. There was so much I hadn't gotten to say before. So much that I almost said, but didn't.

 _The siren system blared throughout the valley._

 _A grim feeling set in my stomach._

 _Everyone was running around, freaking out._

 _Someone harshly bumped into my shoulder. "Sorry," They kept on running._

 _I spotted Raven._

 _Thank God_

 _She looked around for anyone she knew. Once she saw me I ran to her._

" _What's going on?"_

 _She looked afraid to say it. "They're rounding us up for the binary planet trip."_

 _I gave an incredulous laugh. "You're not serious. They can't do that." I glanced around us. My hands went to her shoulders. "They can't do that, can they?"_

 _Her brown eyes held no faith that this wasn't happening._

 _To ask how it was possible would be a very dumb question._

" _They're going to take as many people as they can," She started. "They can't get everyone. Some will run."_

 _My hands tightened on her shoulders. "Then let's run, you and me." I paused at the doubt in her eyes. "Unless you don't want to?"_

 _Her eyes softened. "I can't."_

 _My hands well away. "Because of him? Because of Zeke?"_

 _They were broken up but I knew she didn't want to stop having him in her life._

" _Because of me," She got me to look deep into her eyes. "Because of me. And it's not just him I-"_

 _Bellamy, Clarke, and Madi ran into us._

" _Come on, we have to go before they leave," Clarke said. "We'll be fine. In theory."_

 _My forehead creased. "You knew about this?"_

 _Bellamy averted his gaze._

 _Raven looked at the ground._

" _You all knew about this and you didn't tell anybody?"_

" _We weren't sure," Bellamy grabbed me up._

 _I pushed him back._

 _Raven held a hand between us. "We didn't tell you, that's on us. But we can't run, Murphy. I need you up there." Her eyes begged mine. "Please, don't run." She brought her hand to my face. "Please,"_

 _I wouldn't ever run away from her. Not because she was the only one that got me, but because I couldn't imagine a world where I didn't get to see her every day._

 _My head nodded._

 _She let out a breath of relief._

" _Alright, let's go!" Bellamy started to run, he tugged Madi along by the hand and had his other hand on the small of Clarke's back._

 _I wanted to offer my help to Raven to run but I knew she didn't need it._

 _We entered the ship. The rest of the group waited for us._

" _What the hell is going on?" Octavia questioned behind us._

" _We're going to space," Harper answered her._

 _Indra looked like she couldn't fathom the idea._

 _Octavia held a lost look on her face._

 _Diyoza came over the intercom system. "Everyone try to remain calm. If you want to live board the ship. Everything will be explained to you once you wake up. We're going home."_

" _What is she talking about?" Octavia looked to her brother._

" _They're about of another civilization on another planet, O. They're thriving. The planet is much bigger than Earth. They've got more resources."_

 _Her head shook in confusion, her locks shook with her. "How do you know this?"_

 _Zeke appeared. "I told them." He looked at Raven first._

 _She hugged him._

 _My jaw clenched._

 _Clarke stared at me when I looked up._

" _Got something to say, Princess?"_

 _Lately, I could feel myself get less and less enthused about things. And more and more annoyed with people. Not really Raven, just everyone else. Including myself._

" _Nope," She glanced at Bellamy with a very specific look._

 _My eyes rolled._

 _Diyoza's messaged repeated over again._

" _Are we really going to another planet?" Echo asked._

 _Bellamy nodded. "It's the best chance we've got. How long before Earth decides to have another praimfaya? Then all of our progress would've been for nothing."_

 _Our mass nightblood ceremony made a bit more sense now._

 _Clarke hugged her mom._

 _Everyone said their momentary goodbyes._

 _I watched Zeke and Raven have their moment. Jealousy sat in my belly._

 _She turned to me, ready to embrace me when we were all forced further into the ship._

 _I made sure she didn't get hurt in the stampede._

 _We were directed toward pods next to each other._

 _The sirens grew louder._

 _We looked at each other at a loss for words._

" _Raven, I know this is a terrible time to say this, but I never said it before because I thought we'd have time..."_

 _Her eyes widened, a worried look came over her face._

 _At that moment I knew she didn't want me to say what I was about to say._

 _So I took a deep breath and was about to give her some bullshit about how our friendship was so very crucial l to my evolving. While it was, it wasn't what I wanted her to know forever._

 _We were ushered inside the pods before another word could be spoken. But before everything went black, we looked at each other._

I got out of the pod and watched others do the same.

Raven carefully brought her braced leg down before she stood. She glanced at me, then her eyes rolled back into her head as she collapsed.

I caught her before she fell.

"Raven," Clarke came over. Her hand went to her forehead.

The sound of bodies hitting the floor caught our attention. One out of every ten people were out.

"What the hell?" I looked around at our friends. "Clarke," I nodded in Bellamy's direction.

She turned around just as he tipped over and thudded to the floor. She quickly crawled to him in worry.

Monty and Harper helped Indra while Octavia looked on in shock between her trusted mentor and brother. Her eyes locked on mine.

I hadn't much liked her once we landed. Sure, she was badass, but she needed to chill. We hadn't had much interaction before and not much after we got back to the ground. Looking into her now I could see she was very scared and much more lonely than she let on. She buried all of that and put on a front of caring about no one when that clearly wasn't the case no matter how cold she came across.

She looked away and went to her brother, her hair hung like a curtain to hide her emotions.

I picked Raven up in my arms and headed for the exit.

"Murphy, where are you going?" Clarke asked.

"You don't know what's wrong with them, I'm going to look for someone that does."

Zeke and I almost ran into each other as we rounded the corner.

He cursed under his breath when he looked at her. Something about it him was different but I couldn't pinpoint it.

"What? You know what this is?" I demanded.

He gazed at her in a daze.

I gritted my teeth. "Zeke!"

His attention snapped to me. "She'll be okay. The others in her same state will be fine. Help me get them to our infirmary."

I stepped in his way. "Woah, I don't give a damn about the others. Where do I take Raven?"

He gave me a knowing look before we called for backup on his wristwatch. He backed away, then turned to help the others.

Instead of waiting, I hooked a right and made my way down the hall. People I sort of recognized ran for in the direction I came, they all sort of looked a bit off.

"Murphy," Abby headed my way.

I felt relief at the sight of her, or rather someone with her skill set. Then I took in her appearance. Her skin grew a bit wrinkly, her hair was grayer than I'd ever seen it. That's when it hit me. Zeke looked different because he was older than when we left him.

"Abby, what's going on here?"

She ushered me out of the ship. "We can explain everything once everyone is taken care of,"

We walked out into another world completely, which I supposed was the plan, but I hadn't expected it to bring a sting of tears to my eyes.

A big glowing planet took over the sky which was a breathtaking mixture of purples, blues, pinks, oranges, and blacks; a perfect sunset. Buildings floated in the air at various levels. The sky lined with a metro system that traveled above our heads. The ground was a dusty reddish orange that crunched underneath my boots. People went about their lives as if this wasn't the most beautiful place they'd ever seen. The stars were so different from this view.

I looked down at Raven for her reaction, then saddened when I remembered she wasn't okay.

"We can fix her," Abby insisted warmly. She gestured for me to follow her.

Others pulled out of the ship.

I turned around in time to see Octavia's reaction.

Unbeknownst to her, I watched a tear slid down her face and another while she took in our new home in awe.

Abby led me up to a giant, clear tube that reached up toward one of the floating buildings. Every building had them. "The others will come, then we'll have time for pleasantries."

Was that why she hadn't rushed to see her daughter who she hadn't seen in presumably a decade or so? Why had she woken up before us? Why hadn't she demanded we be awoken before now?

We were sent up the tube faster than I expected, but there wasn't any nausea or disorientation. Before I could take in everything, Abby ushered into the building that surprisingly resembled most hospitals pre-Becca in the way that there were waiting rooms, check in desks, and more than two trained professionals. Much like the outside of the building the inside was sleek, grey, and surgical. People in red lab coats walked the halls talking to patients, to colleagues, rushing into multiple directions while codes were streamed over an intercom system.

"Are we almost there?" It felt like we'd been walking forever.

She came to a door and held it open for me. "I'm dropping you off while I got help the others."

I entered the room. "Thanks."

She gave a single nod before she took off.

There was a tiny hall that led me to a dark haired woman with her back to us. She seemed to be working on something intensely.

"Abby told me to come here, she said you could help my friend."

"Lay her down on the bed," She said without turning around.

I sat Raven down on one of the beds. "Can you help her?" I pushed her stray hairs back on her head while I hoped for the best.

"Guess nothing's changed at all,"

I looked up at the woman and stilled. "Madi?"

She offered a smug smile. "Grandma didn't tell you, did she?"

I was sort of at a loss for words because the woman that stood before me was no child any longer. That was how life went but we hadn't gotten to see that happen for her. Clarke didn't get to see it. And I could only hope there was a good explanation for our delay in rejoining society.

 **The song for this pov is Hey Violet - Guys My Age**

CLARKE'S POV:

Zeke and Monty carried Bellamy toward the travel tubes while I stared at my mom with several feet of distance between us. She also looked nothing like how I left her. She was older, more distinguished looking. That rose the question of how when we'd been in cryosleep for longer than intended.

What happened? Had something gone wrong?

She came to hug me. "Clarke," She wrapped her arms around me.

Subconsciously I knew it was supposed to feel like I hadn't seen her for about five minutes but I felt the years separation nonetheless when I hugged her back.

In the madness of everything, I forgot that Madi's pod had been empty when I woke up.

"She's safe, she's here." My mom said to relax my worries.

That sunk in, as did my mom's knowledge of the unconsenting use of my daughter. "Take me to her," I pulled away. "Now," Whatever that they'd done to her they did without my consent and that made me angry. How could my own mother do this?

"I know you're upset with me but once you've been to the assembly it'll all make sense."

How was any of this going to make sense?

Once my mom pointed out the room I dashed inside to see Madi.

She looked up from treating Raven.

All the air left me.

"You're so big." I stared in astonishment. She grew up beautifully. She helped out with the practice.

She finished pushing some liquid into Raven's bloodstream, then jogged to me for a hug. "Clarke,"

I noticed before she hugged me that her red lab coat had white stitching on the front that read 'Madison Griffin, M.D. Lab Medicine'. So many emotions filled me. Pride. Confusion. Joy. Excitement. Fear. Anger. Gratefulness. One was too difficult to land on.

How long were we asleep? Long enough for my daughter to have gotten a degree in Medicine apparently.

Murphy and I looked at each other.

His head shook a little. He turned his attention back to Raven who came to rather quickly.

Once I was assured she was medically okay I made my rounds to check on everyone else with the help of my mom. Bellamy was our last stop.

He talked to one of the Doctors when we walked up. He looked perfectly healthy, perfectly fine.

Yet I still worried.

I placed my hand on his arm. "Maybe you should take it easy?" I stared up at him, hoping he'd pick up on my stress level and act accordingly.

He stared down at me and without having to confirm he grabbed my hand. "Excuse us, David. Abby." He pulled me along to a more secluded dip in the hall, tested the door, and pulled us inside.

I tried to control my heartbeat but it was frantic from the way his thumb ran over the back of my hand. There was no doubt in my mind that he was going to back me into the wall and plant one on me.

As predicted he hoisted me up against the wall so that my legs wrapped around his waist. He pressed into me with a cocky smirk. His mouth teased mine without giving me what I wanted.

"You're being the definition of a cocktease, Bell." My arms draped over his shoulders. One of my hands ran through the back of his hair. I moved my mouth toward his with a dazed grin on my face I'm sure.

He redirected his lips to my neck. "I would give you what you want if you give me what I want." He referred to our having kept our dating a secret for a few weeks.

I sighed and lightly pushed him off so he'd look at me. My eyes ran over his handsome face. "I just want this to be our thing for a while. Everyone's always had an opinion on our friendship. I don't think they deserve to put us in the spotlight when we're still getting used to it ourselves."

He gave in with a nod, but I knew he wasn't thrilled about it.

"Hey," My hands cupped his face. "You know I'm not ashamed of us right?" I tried to gauge his honest reaction through his eyes.

"Yeah," He nodded. But his eyes said otherwise. "I know that." He placed me down on my feet. "We should get back to the others," His eyes strayed.

Guilt formed around my heart. The last thing I wanted was for him to think I wasn't beyond siked for this thing between us.

I cupped one of his big, strong hands in mine, then leaned up to whisper into his ear. "I'll make it up to you later. Promise."

He raised an interested brow at me. "Keep talking,"

We hadn't actually had sex yet. We really wanted to but for the sake of taking things slow we held off. Everything else was checked off and damn was it hot to be doing it under everyone's noses at the valley.

I bit my bottom lip to display my interest. My body pressed against his side. "What do you say we go knock some boots tonight?"

He surprised me by laughing. "Knock some boots? Where'd you get that?"

My hand slapped his chest while my face burned. "I'm trying to be sexy and you're just making fun of me." I pouted.

"Come here," He turned around and leaned down to cup my cheek, his lips pressed into mine.

No matter how many times we'd kissed I still felt slightly cross-eyed when we finished.

"You're still sexy even though one of your eyes is looking in the opposite direction," He teased with a chuckle.

I relentlessly swatted at him until he grabbed my hands and backed us into the wall again with his hands tightened around my wrists above us.

His warm breath tickled my lips with him barely an inch away. "What did I say about hitting?"

I was happy to play this game. "That it turns you on," I gave him a look so he'd confirm that I was into it.

He looked down at me like I was something to eat.

My breath caught when he slid down my body, his hot breath tickled my pelvis as he undid my jeans. When he yanked them down I moaned.

His chocolate brown eyes gazed up at me with the knowing gleam that he was about to make me cum. He waited until I was pooling with desperation until he put his mouth on me and I melted into the wall, his hands held me up.

The thing about Bellamy was that he knew how to please me, confuse me, make me want to punch him then immediately please him all while making me trust him with my entire life effortlessly. Maybe that was why the orgasms were so out of this world.

The song for this pov is X Ambassadors - Renegades

MURPHY'S POV:

Abby and a clean cut older man entered the room when I poured Raven some water.

"John, Raven," She gestured to the man. "This is David. He's the City Director."

He reached forward a hand, a nice enough smile on his face. "David Collins." His pale skin and dark hair had a familiarity to it but it was on the tip of my tongue.

Raven, however, placed it almost immediately. "Collins. You wouldn't happen to have records of your genealogy by chance?"

"Actually, I do." He perked up. "Would you like to discuss it sometime?"

My forehead knitted together. "We would love to," I inserted myself into the equation.

His brow lifted enough to signal he questioned our entanglement. "My apologies, you misunderstood, John-"

"It's Murphy actually." I sat on the side of the bed.

Raven scooted beside me. "Don't apologize, he's being a jerk on purpose. That's kind of his thing." She teased.

I gave her a look that made her fight her grin.

She averted her eyes coyly.

Abby cleared her throat. "Gather your friends. There will be an assembly shortly and then you'll have nothing but time to acclimate." She towed David off in a deeper conversation.

Madi excused herself. "I'm going to go find Clarke,"

Raven sat up straighter. "No, you don't have to," She almost begged.

Guess she really didn't want to talk about what I was about to confess so many years ago.

"It's fine, I have paperwork to do." Madi awkwardly exited while looking at her wristband.

We sat stock still for a few moments.

I pursed my lips ready to say something when she said, "Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

My head turned to look at her. "Seriously?"

She nodded.

"Would it have made a difference?" I posed for her to think about.

Her lips readied to say something, but nothing came out. Her eyelids fluttered in indecision.

"Yeah," I stood up. "That's what I thought." My back faced her, I slid my hands into my pants pockets. "I didn't tell you because I knew nothing would change. At least, nothing good would change."

"So why tell me then?"

Something in my wretched. "Because-" My voice cracked. I turned back to her with my whole body aflame. "Because I didn't want the chance of us dying and my never having had the balls to tell how I felt."

Her eyes were locked on mine. "How do you..." She stood, her hands wiped at her sides. "You never really said..."

I took a step closer. "How do I feel about you?"

Her head gave the barest of nods. She swallowed the lump in her throat.

"I've never been very great at opening up and sharing myself. With you," My eyes took her in the way I wanted to for the first time with her knowledge of my doing so. "I gave you pieces of me that no one else has ever had," I moved closer.

She stood as still as cardboard.

"Most of the time I feel this darkness inside of me, you are one of the only things that keep at bay. You make me feel enormously out of your league and I like that." I took away the last bit of distance between us. "You're easily the most gorgeous person I know and I'm not talking about just your looks."

Her brown eyes stared up at me not knowing what to say.

A small grin came to my lips. "You don't have to say anything back." I leaned down a bit to speak next to her ear. "Now you know." When I pulled away I saw a look in her eyes that had never been there while looking at me before.

She was about to say something when there was a knock on the door.

We looked past the curtain that separated the two beds in the room to find Monty and Harper.

"This huge assembly thing is supposed to be in like five minutes. You guys coming?" Harper inquired.

We looked at each other momentarily.

Everyone gathered in a big assembly room. We all sat in the same row.

David soon went to the stage and started his spiel once we settled down. "Greetings," His voice amplified over the room. He gestured to us all. "I'm sure you're very confused. You must have questions. I'll start by telling the start of our little home." The screen behind him lit up in a presentation. "As some of you are aware before the nuclear apocalypse Bill Cadogan started a cult called the Second Dawn. That cult gave way to the what you know as the Grounder culture. Becca prom heda was the first commander and succeeded in creating night blood, yes, but she also worked with Cadogan on a thirteenth seal, that seal being this planet." The image behind him switched to young photos of the dirt covered planet.

"My head hurts," Octavia muttered next to Indra.

Indra looked on in pure fascination with the new information, information that would change how she viewed her culture forever, how she viewed herself.

"They didn't do it alone." David continued. "The Eligius Corporation didn't just send prisoners out to mine, they sent them out to look for habitable planets. The Second Dawn saved the human race on the ground in hopes that one day humanity would populate a binary planet. Cadogan and Becca knew that a two Sun system was key to our survival. Our very own Charmaine Diyoza was called to lead the expedition."

Bellamy and I shared a curious look. Things started to fall into place, it grew to make sense, but there were so many questions.

I leaned over into Raven's space, her body heat felt nice on my skin. "What do you think of all of this?" I whispered.

She turned her face to mine and her eyes widened a bit at the closeness of our mouths. "I think you won't learn anything if you don't pay attention." Her sass wasn't lost on me.

I smirked to myself.

To be honest, I tuned out of the rest of the assembly. Anything needed to know I could get from the others.

Applause erupted around us.

A random woman stood on stage with David. "You're free to roam," She gestured for us to explore.

Everyone made their way outside again.

Raven hadn't really taken in the scene before but the look on her face now said it all.

I could look at her like that forever and not get bored.

"It's breathtaking," She muttered, she tilted her head back to gaze up at the sky.

My heart skipped a few beats. "My thoughts exactly."

Her eyes joined mine.

So she didn't have to say anything, I drew my attention to the others.

Monty and Harper freely held hands, he even twirled her around a few times in good measure. She fell back into him in laughter. They jogged forward.

Bellamy looked back at Clarke with a child's grin. She smiled back at him, then they ran with the others, ready to discover the unknown.

"You can go with them, Murphy," Raven interjected. "I won't mind."

I looked at her beside me. "I'm good right here." My hand squeezed the back of my neck. "John," I blurted out.

"Huh?"

We stared at each other.

"You can call me John." My mouth grew dry. "I'd like it if you called me John." I shoved the hand on my neck into my pocket. "You know if you want." I waited for her to say something.

She simply gave a budding smile that made her perfect golden brown skin glow even more. "John," She tested it out. "I like it. It fits you."

A bit of a blush tinged my cheeks. "I know," I tried to play it cool.

She playfully shoved my shoulder. "Whatever,"

I laughed while I swung my arm around her shoulders as we walked. "Just don't go catching feelings for this new and improved me," I warned. "Now that I've arrived the women will be crawling to me," My extra tone let on that I was entirely joking.

She made a noise at the back of her throat that made me question if there was a hint of jealousy in there. "Good luck with that," Her hand intertwined with mine hanging from her shoulder. The act wasn't anything out of the ordinary but after everything that's been said and done it felt momentous to me.

Maybe it wasn't as big a deal as I made it out to be, but the deeper we got into the city the longer she held on. Whether or not she felt the same way or started wasn't up to me, I wanted to be okay with whatever ended up happening. I just extremely hoped that she ended up happy with me.

She smiled over at me.

I swallowed to alleviate the dryness in my throat, then gave my best attempt at a smile back.

A/N: This took surprisingly longer than expected to write for only ten pages. I have to credit 2199days_ on Instagram for the fan theories about the season five finale and season six plot. At this point, if you haven't seen them you might as well. You've read this fic and it contained a decent amount of theories, none that I created. It really does all make sense and when I read it like four/five days ago I was so shook that I couldn't get this fic out of my mind. My The 100 Instagram account is zaven_murven. Please let me know what you think below: How do you like Murve, does Bellarke feel too forward, and would you like to see Octavia's povs sprinkled in? I've got a plot for her that I put on my Insta for what I wanted of her in season six (I'm pretty sure it's gone now).


End file.
